If you’re a woman desiring a man in your life, it’s a great idea to take some time to really focus on learning what it is that men really want in a woman.
Have you ever sat down and really thought about this? Do you and your female friends discuss attributes you think men might be attracted to about you? Do you strive to be the type of woman a guy would want?
If you’re a man, you may be intrigued as to what other men desire in women. Maybe your thoughts don’t quite match up or maybe you’re spot on. Either way, let’s take a look at some of the most desirable traits and characteristics that men want in women.
1. Men want a woman who is happy.
Listen, men do like to tinker and fix things, but they don’t necessarily want a woman who is not happy and thinks that her man will fix her. Do you know why? Because a man can’t fix happy; each person is responsible for his or her own happiness.
You know what happens when a man dates an unhappy woman and turns out he can’t “make” her happy? He feels like a failure. He feels like whatever he says or does is no help and this can get quite frustrating.
Men want women who are happy at least much of the time. It’s understandable we all have our down days, but for the most part a happy demeanor is quite attractive.
2. Men want a woman that helps him feel masculine
If you’ve got a strong personality and are not keen on embracing your feminine side, your masculinity may turn guys off. Why? It can make them feel emasculated or like a little boy and you’re his mother bossing him around.
Men don’t want to date “Mom”.
They want to feel masculine and a great way to help a guy feel strong and confident is to lean on that masculinity at times. Not in an insecure or weak way, but in balance. You know what most men like to hear? “Oh hun. That darn sink is leaking again and I can’t unscrew the faucet.
Can you please use those badass muscles to do fix that drip for me?” Just watch. He’ll perk up. He’ll feel macho and useful. Help your guy to feel and own his masculine energy.
3. Men want a woman who is secure
If you’re insecure and clingy, you may repel men. If you tell him he can’t hang out with his friends (because you will miss him), bet and believe he’s feeling imprisoned and turned off. Men want women who are secure in themselves.
Women who have some self-worth. Of course, you can be a work in progress (we all are), but neediness and insecurity creates dissension and sometimes toxicity in a relationship.
4. Men want a woman who is thoughtful
Thoughtfulness goes a long way. Men like women who will pick them up their favorite take-out spontaneously or tuck a love note into his work bag. Has he had an extra tough week at work? A massage does wonders.
There are hundreds of thoughtful things women can do to get a guy’s attention and of course, reciprocity is important. Turns out when one is thoughtful, unless the guys a narcissist, he’ll be more likely to reciprocate that thoughtfulness without even thinking about it.
5. Men want a woman who smiles
Relationship experts state that one of the things men first notice about a woman is her smile. Show the teeth and you’ve already got some brownie points with the guys. Why? It goes back to happiness. When a woman is happy, that happiness radiates outward and it helps others feel good too. Happy oftentimes breeds happy.
6. Men want a woman who is sensual
It’s fairly common knowledge that men like women who are sensual. It simply gets their blood pumping. Notice I said sensual; not slutty. There’s a big difference. Sensual has to do with the senses. It doesn’t always have to do with sex either, as you could have a sensual delight in eating.
Essentially, men like women who can pull off sensuality without being lewd and it doesn’t matter what size a woman is. Using tone of voice, body language, clothing, eye contact, etc., a woman can get a guy’s sensory attention for sure.
7. Men want a trusting woman
Trust is a big issue in a relationship. Just as women desire men they can trust, men desire women they can trust. Along with this, keeping their word is up there on the list. If a woman says she is going to do something, men want her to follow through. It says something about the personality and integrity.
8. Men want a woman who will hold space for him
To hold space for someone means to let them be where they are on their journey with no judgement and let them figure it out. It means you’re there for them and you celebrate who they are regardless of whether you think they are this or that.
Men want women who they can feel safe with. They want to know that if they don’t have it all together (and they don’t), that a woman will still love and care for him. Support him. This is where vulnerability comes in. Men tend to carry a lot on their shoulders.
They feel compelled to come across as strong and having it together, but the truth is that they don’t always feel that way. Sometimes they feel like a scared or angry little boy. Sometimes they feel frustrated, confused, and very sad.
Men want a woman who will not take it personal if they have some sort of struggle or a breakdown. They want a woman who will “hold space” for them and love them unconditionally while they work it out. It allows them to be real with themselves and others and it feels very freeing.
9. Men want a woman who will have sex regularly
Maybe not right away, but should a commitment be made to seriously date or marry, guys want to be intimate with their woman. Regularly. They don’t want the honeymoon period to be off-the-chain and then the rest of their years lacking passion and sex.
After all, many men have a high sex drive and find sex to be exciting, passionate, and relaxing all at the same time. If you ask married men one of their most common complaints, many will tell you lack of sex ranks up there pretty high. The miss it and they’d like more of it.
10. Men want a woman who will cook
Sure, there are exceptions, but a great way to get to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Want to have an edge on other women? Cook. Cook delicious meals for your guy sometimes.
Now, women may think this sounds sexist, but I’m not suggesting women have to cook “all the time”, but sometimes put the effort into making a freakin’ awesome meal and have a romantic dinner. What guy wouldn’t appreciate that?
Do you know other traits men want in women? Feel free to share.